Getting to the Who of Who You Are

Pam's Personal Message to You...

My name is Pam and I am a recovering "Someone to Somebody". Yes, I admit it! I spent my entire childhood, teenage years, and part of my adulthood being everything to everyone.

Sadly, I did not take into account that by not being who I needed to be for me, not only was I compromising my own integrity, but I was not being the best I could be to others and myself. If I think about it and if I am truly honest with myself, I wasn't really living.

Why did I do this?

Frankly, I had no clue who I was and I was scared to find out.  First, because I didn't know how. How does one start to get to know oneself?

Second, I feared that if I truly was being me people wouldn't like me. That was a bit ironic considering I didn't know who I was at my core. 

Left with no clear options, I lived my life and became a person defined by others' expectations and directions. However, somehow, deep down inside I knew that living that way was not congruent with who I really was. It just never felt quite right.

I felt like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole. Not only did it feel uncomfortable, but it felt like something was missing.  Hells bells, I was missing.  As a result my self esteem and self image were low and my actions supported how crappy I felt about me. 

As a matter of fact, I had a terrible thought that maybe it was just best to not be around anymore. I was tired of fighting what was going on inside of me and the fact that it did not match what was going on outside of me. I hit my lowest and that's when I considered suicide.

I have to tell you, I really did not want to die. That was NOT the solution, nor is it EVER the solution.  What I really wanted was for people to stop.

I wanted them to stop telling me that I was not good enough. I wanted them to stop telling me that I needed to do this or that I needed to do that in order to fit in.

Looking back I understand now that what I really wanted was the space and encouragement to explore and find out who I was. I just so desperately wanted someone to take me by the hand and show me how.

It was not about anyone else, it was about me and feeling OK being me.

When I hit my late 30s I began to realize that in order for me to grow, to be successful, and to move forward, it was important to know who I was and to be my authentic self. I became a woman on a mission and it was then that I began to look at all the options available to me. Options such as, coaching, exploring different activities, reading, sharing, meeting others, and most importantly digging deep inside of me.

Once I took the leap and spent some real time with me, asking myself some pretty tough questions, I became aware that what was inside of me was really wonderful. It was neither scary nor awful. Actually, I came to find out that Pam was an A-OK person with a huge heart and lots to offer.

And guess what? When I truly acknowledged who I was and started living my life as me for me, wonderful things began to happen.

Today, I am happy to report that I now know who I am. I know what ignites my fire and what my purpose is. I no longer live by anyone's expectations but my own. In turn, I have created an amazing coaching practice, have a happy and well-adjusted son, completed a Master's program in Industrial/Organizational Psychology, have established some awesome friendships with some of the most incredible people.  And the potentials just keep showing up. What's even better, my success is based on me and my actions, not based on what others think I should be or should be doing.

Now it's your turn to have some fun getting to the who of who you are. May the process be simply amazing for you!

 ISBN: 978-0-9797131-0-1
Pages: 18

Price: $7.99    
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